Dear Life

11:28 PM

Why must you be so complicated? Why can't it all be simple?

If you like someone, why can't you just tell them instead of playing mind games in your own head? And if they don't give you the answer you're looking for isn't it better that you know anyways so that you can move on and find someone who does care? If you don't like something about what's going on in your life can't you just try to change it or walk away from it?

But it's never that easy. If you like someone and you've built that friendship with them people usually shy away from telling someone about their feelings because they're scared they'll ruin the friendship at the least. I mean we've all been there and you'd be lying if you said you haven't. Or if you don't like your job, you usually stick it out anyways at least until you find something else because you need money and this is all you got. Or if there is someone you can't stand but your best friend is close with them you'll still be nice to that person because of your best friend.


It sucks sometimes. But what's worse sometimes is society and its expectations. God forbid you're an 18 year old who has not had sex. You're like a unicorn in this world and maybe there's something wrong with you because boys especially should have lost it when they were like 14. Well I was that unicorn, I lost mine at 18 years old and I have no regrets because it meant something to me. I didn't die or shrivel into an old hag because I didn't have it at 16. But hey even if you have had it younger, then good for you! It's your body and your life, why should other people tell you what to do? If you felt like you were ready and you don't regret it then that's honestly all that matters.

Not that long ago a lady told me, and I quote:

"You have a smart mouth and it's not very lady like of you"

Like what? First of all who are you? Second of all, fuck off. I love my smart mouth, sarcastic sense of humour and it may not be very lady like of me, but it's who I am. I've been told that I'm too skinny, I don't have the right curves, I need a bigger butt, I need bigger boobs, I have the body of a 12 year old boy, I'm too short, my teeth aren't perfect, my hair is too short for a girl, I'm too sarcastic, too much of a tomboy, wear too much makeup, don't wear enough make up, not smart enough, blah, blah, blah. And yes, there comes a point in life where eventually it gets to you. My breaking point was in high school where I actually went to see a therapist. I started to let other peoples words define me to the point that I lost who I was as a person.

But why? LOVE YOURSELF. Be you! Why does society have so many standards for both guys and girls? Why is there this unspoken pressure that if you don't fit into the mould then you're not a worthy human being? It's the people who are quick to point everyone else's flaws that usually end up having the most flaws themselves.

So I say fuck society and it's standards.

Be whoever and whatever you want to be. Do whatever it is that makes you happy (as long as it is legal, I don't want to people to be frolicking naked down a street and being sent to jail), wear whatever makes you feel confident, say what's on your mind, and take your life into your hands. Don't let someone else live your life for you because we only really have one and it would be a waste if you didn't live to yours fullest.

With that I'm off to bed,

Love you all.

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