Are you on a leash?

2:24 PM

Dear Mr. Awesome;

Thank you for your lovely e-mail and yes very original name indeed. So I have finally decided to answer your questions and have gotten the opinions from many others.

Part one: Should a guy be responsible to support a girl in the relationship (pay for dates, pay for little things like coffee, cab fares, etc).

I'm sorry I almost tripped on your leash. Does your girlfriend/boyfriend always keep you so tightly wrapped up? Well that blows. Maybe it's time for your balls to drop and to grow a back bone? Harsh, I know but until you stand up for yourself things won't change. Here i'll go grab you some water, you just wait for me in your doghouse.

Personally I say no. You're young, not married, and this isn't the medieval times. Girls should not need to play the part of the damsel in distress anymore. We are independent, smart, and can be just as powerful as men. But some girls still like to play the damsel in distress. They like to wait for their knight to riding up his dodge truck and save the day. To constantly tell her how beautiful and wondrous she is. To shower her with gifts and always come up with these romantic gestures, each one better than the next.Why?

Don't get me wrong, every girl loves to be complimented and gifts or romantic gestures are thoughtful when they are not expected. We shouldn't need to be bought for our affection. Girls are all about fighting for their right and being treated equals, but then they expect someone to support them? If the roles were reversed should you want to support someone completely? Now girls let's be honest most of us would be like HELL NO, but instead we say "we could split the cost". So there's your answer. Split the costs amongst each other. I mean that poor guy is already working his ass off. He has to pay for gas, food for himself, gym memberships, his drinks and cab fares, his movie ticket, his.. you get the point. And now a days gas is costly. Now the boy has to pay for your ticket, the gas to go drive and pick you up, your lunch, your half of the cab fare, your drinks, your random cute little gifts that you are expecting him to buy? Geez if I were a boy I would just stay away from girls for life.

So girls and some guys out there who do this to; just stop. It's not right. It's not the guys job to take care of you. If you're not even married you have some serious issues going on. Well serious seems a bit extreme, but not being independent is not good. You don't develop a self-esteem, you can't do things for yourself, and you don't really have an identity you will always be "her friend" "his girlfriend" "that one girl" is that what you want?

So split the bill. If a guy offers to pay then take it, but always suggest to split. It shows that you are independent and fair. No one likes a stage five clinger as Jay (http://justanotherbeautifulthought.blogspot.com/) has pointed out.

Part two: Is it right if a girl says she can text other guys but a guy can't text other girls? What if you already cheated on the girl?

As Jay, Adam, my boyfriend, Alex, Mark, and my other friends have pointed out there is one key foundation to every relationship.

Trust.

So if she doesn't trust you and still uses the fact that you cheated on her as her defence for thing, your relationship will always be stuck on this rut. You will never really move forward. And putting a guy on a short leash will only push him farther away from you. Guys like to know that you do trust them. And if it's too hard to then maybe its time to walk away.

Now even if you didn't cheat on her it's still not right. First of all you are not his mother. Not even his mother can really control who he does and doesn't talk to. And he is not your puppet to just play around with. Yes there is boundaries. He should not be flirting via text with other girls and girl should not do the same either.

Now most of us are like "mmm i'm so glad i don't do that" but think again. I'm sure when a new message pops up on his phone from some girl you feel a little bit jealous. or maybe he's close to someone of the opposite sex and it drives you just a little bit crazy, and you try to deny it but sometimes it just happens to be brought up in an argument. It's happened to me! But being jealous is natural, but again comes in the trust factor. You can always express your slight jealousy and talk to him about it and i'm sure things will work out, but as soon as you become this raging envious monster who treats him less than you and controls him that's when he shut down and backs away

(note you can always replace the he's with she's if your a guy reading this. Girls are the same way in a situation like this)

hope all is well my lovelies and keep sending those emails : )

From Brittany,

With love.

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